A horrible ride

Not so slowly did O'Neil's affection for me grow. Instead of boarding the bus and sitting somewhere near me, he had decided that he wanted to sit WITH me. In the same seat! Problem there was that Vanessa was already my seat mate, but that didn't seem to phase him any. He would approach us with a mencing stare and proceed to eject Vanessa from her seat. I always sat at the window, so she was closest to the isle. I'd feel bad for her, she was tossed around like a feather. But my sympathy for her didn't last long. It was me I was begining to feel sorry for.
Here I was, only 11 years old and being strong-armed by a young man who was triple my size in every way. He terrified me. He would try to show his affection by smacking me on the ass when I'd walk off the bus. He would grab my chest at his leisure since I was only an arms length away on the seat. I soon began standing with my back against the window and my book bag hung in front of me trying to block his wondering hands. Even though my young 11 year old brain tried to think of everything imaginable to guard my body, it never worked. He was progessing, and not at a slow pace.
Christmas break couldn't come fast enough. Having almost 3 whole weeks away from my horrible bus ride to and from school was all I could think of. 3 days before the break I hit what I thought was my breaking point. I could no longer deal with the fear of the bus ride. Wondering what he was going to do to me that day. I finally conjured enough courage to tell someone.
As soon as the bus dropped us off at school that morning, I grabbed Vanessa and begged her to come with me to tell the Vice Principle. I wanted someone to back up my story, but also, I needed the emotional support greatly.
We walked into the front office side by side. It took all I had not to break down in tears as I told the receptionist that I needed to talk Mrs. Lungstun. She instructed us to take a seat and that the VP would be with us shortly. About 10 minutes later Mrs. Lungstun walked in and asked us to follow her to her office and take a seat.
"What can I do for you ladys this morning?" She asked
"I...uh.. umm.. I have a problem.." I stammered
"O.K., I'll try to help. What's the problem?"
I figited with the straps of my bag, unable to meet her eye. I was embarressed and sad. I couldn't even speak the words.
"There's this boy.. umm.. on the bus.. he.. umm.. well...he's bothering me"
"Hmm.. O.K. Bothering you how exactly?" She asks as she folds her hands on the desk.
"Well..umm.. well.. when he gets on the bus.. he.. well.. he pushes Vanessa off the seat so he can sit with me. I don't ask him to, and I don't want him to but he won't stop"
"So.. Vanessa.. is this true? Does he push you?"
Vanessa can't meet Mrs. Lungstun's eyes either. She looks down, then at me, then back down again. "Yes, ma'am. He does push me"
"O.K., well tell me this boy's name and I'll have a talk with him" She says almost dismissively.
Vanessa and I stay seated, there's more we want to say but don't know how to say it. I take a deep breath and hold it. I look up and she's staring at us, waiting for our answer.
"Umm.. there's more. He.. well.. he also touches me" I stammer
"What do you mean he touches you? How does he touch you?"
"Well, he'll smack my butt when I walk down the isle to get off the bus. And umm.. he'll also grab my.. he'll touch.. umm.. he grabs me here!" I say as I point to my chest.
She leans back in her chair and takes in what I've just said. "Vanessa, have you seen this boy do that to her?"
"Yes, ma'am, I have"
"And what is happening when he does this?"
Vanessa sits and thinks for a moment "What do you mean what is happening when he does this?"
"I mean.. what did she do to make him do this? Did she ask him to do it? Was she touching him 1st? And what does she do after he does these things?"
My mouth flung open. What did she just say to Vanessa?
Did she seriously just ask her if I ASKED to be fondled? OH MY GOD!! Why would she even ask that? Why would I be sitting here complaining about it if I asked for it???
I just sat there in astonishment. I couldn't believe what she was insinuating.
"Vanessa? Please answer me" she asked, as she leaned back over her desk towards us.
"No, she doesn't ask him to touch her. He just does it. He does it after he pushes me out of the seat. She doesn't do anything. She turns her back on him to try to ignore him, I guess."
Mrs. Lungstun turns towards me "So you turn your back on him? You show him your backside, even though that is what you know he's going to grab? Don't you think that is like offering him to do it? Giving him the green light to go ahead?"
OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!!! Is she really asking me that?
I had thought I recovered from the 1st crack she made at me while sitting there, but this just blew me away! How could she even think I would ask for this? Why isn't she believing me when I say I didn't do anything to make him do this?
I couldn't answer her. I just stared down at my hands. I didn't know what to say. I couldn't believe this was going so horribly wrong.
"Answer my question, J. If you didn't want him touching your backside, why would you turn and put it right out there for him?"
"I thought that if I wasn't looking at him, if I was acting like I was ignoring him, he'd leave me alone"
"So you never actually TOLD him to stop, then?"
"No, ma'am. I guess I never did"
"Well, I guess your lesson today is, he doesn't know you don't like it, if you haven't told him so. I will be speaking to this boy as soon as you leave my office to get his side of the story. My advice to you is, tell him no, don't making touching you so easily, and maybe stop wearing those short skirts all the girls like you like to wear to school. Maybe it's the way you're dressing that makes him think you are willing"
I couldn't believe my ears. This woman was actually telling me it was MY fault???
"Thank you Mrs. Lungstun. We have to get to class" I mumbled as I grabbed Vanessa by the sleeve and bolted from the office. I cried all the way to homeroom. I was heartbroken. I couldn't believe the Vice Principle was honestly acting like any of this was my fault. I didn't think my day could get any worse.
I realized I was mistaken when I boarded the bus that afternoon.