Hung over and fed up

I awoke the next morning in more pain than I had when I went to bed. My head was throbbing for various reasons and my body felt like it had been run over by a dumptruck. I didn't want to go to school but I knew if I asked to stay home my parents would be worried and insist on taking me to a doctor. The last thing I wanted to was to go see a Doctor because in my young mind, I thought they would surely know I had gotten drunk the night before and all hell would break loose in my house.

I slowly edged myself out of bed and made a beeline for the shower hoping the hot water would releave some of my aches. When I emerged I didn't feel any different and again wished I could stay home. I was in no mood to put up with anyone, ESPECIALLY O'Neil. I felt like I was moving in slow motion as I got dressed, tried to shove some toast in my mouth and walk to Vanessa's. When her father answered the door, he said something in spanish then snickered. I could only imagine it was along the lines of "Damn girl, you look like shit", but I didn't reply. Vanessa walked out a few minutes later and by the look on her face, I assumed she thought the same thing.

"What the hell happened to you??" She asked

"I kinda, sorta, got drunk last night with Angie then fell in the tub and whacked my head"

"What the hell made you drink??"

"I don't know.. but I don't want to talk about it. My head is STILL pounding and I feel like I'm gonna be sick"

"Yea, you look like you're gonna be sick"

With that, we ended the conversation and made our way to the bus stop chatting about upcoming tests and homework assignments. As the bus pulled to a stop, I took a deep breath and boarded. I knew O'Neil wasn't going to be there yet, but that still didn't make me any less tense. I found my seat, sat down, leaned my head against the window and closed my eyes. The sunlight was making my headache even worse and I dreamed of being back in bed.

Before I knew it, we were pulling up to O'Neil's stop. I kept my eyes closed hoping he would ignore me... and it worked for a short time. The closer we got to school, the more he tried touching me but I didn't move. I tried to act like I was asleep hoping he would get bored and stop. He got as far as sliding his hand up the pant leg of my shorts, however wasn't able to touch anything important. The bus came to a stop at school and we all began to leave. I waited a few more minutes, giving O'Neil and his friends time to exit before I grabbed my own belongings and left. Vanessa met me outside and we continued on our way.

The day seemed to drag and with every hour my head throbbed harder. By the end of the day I seriously thought my head was going to explode. I shut my locker and slowly made my way to the bus, still dreaming of being in bed thinking it was only a little longer and I could be laying down. I climbed the steps to the bus puzzled as why the driver was starring at me but I just shrugged it off and kept walking. My mood hadn't improved throughout the day, infact, it had gotten worse.

Finding the same seat I had that morning, sat down with my eyes closed and my head against the window. The bus was starting to spin and I fought to keep my lunch down. I heard O'Neil as he stomped up the bus steps and wished he would fall and break his neck. He and the bus driver exchanged words, a chuckle, then O'Neil made his way to me. I closed my eyes again prepared to ignore him and act like I was sleeping like I had that morning.

The bus lurched forward and we were finally on our ride home. It didn't take long for O'Neil to pick up where he left off the day before. His disgusting hands roaming by body, assulting me with his fingers. I don't know what pissed me off more.. that he thought he could (still) get away with it or that it was O.K. to touch someone who obviously was (acting) asleep. Whatever it was, it sent me over the edge. The pain in my head and body temporarily left and I was consumed with anger. Wild, scary anger. I saw only red.

"DON'T YOU FUCKING TOUCH ME YOU FUCKING PIECE OF DOG SHIT!! WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU FUCKING ARE?!! YOU WORTHLESS ASSHOLE!! I HATE YOU!! I FUCKING HATE YOU!! I WISH YOU WOULD FUCKING DIE!!" I stood up and screamed as my hands violently waved in the air. I knew I had made contact at least 3 times because the wail O'Neil let out made the entire bus quiet. They all turned and looked at me. I looked at O'Neil, but I could feel 100 pairs of eyes burning into me. I didn't care, I had had enough.

"IF YOU TOUCH ME 1 MORE FUCKING TIME I'M GOING TO FUCKING KILL YOU!!" I ranted and continued swinging until I felt the bus come to a hard stop. I looked around and new we weren't at my bus stop, but couldn't figure out WHY we had stopped. The bus driver was already stomping down the walkway with a red face. He was pissed.

"Get off my bus! Get off right now!" he screamed at me while all the other riders looked in amazement

'What??" I turned toward him

"You heard me! Get off! RIGHT NOW! I won't tolerate that on my bus!"

"You won't tolerate THAT but you'll tolerate what he does to me??" I yelled back

He grabbed me by the back of my shirt and began to drag me. "But we're not even close to the bus stop!"

He said nothing as he continued to pull me towards the doors. I had no idea what I was going to do.